Afternoon at the Park

I’m writing this at the playground of the Methodist church across the street from our house. Parker is sliding down the slides, climbing stairs, and poking her head through portholes. Unlike most Wednesday afternoons, I didn’t have any meetings today. Suzy and P picked me up from work and we had some pretty darn good Middle Eastern food at a place in Saginaw called Taboon.  Now, I still have an hour until my evening class, and so we are here at the playground. It feels luxurious to have an hour to just sit. That kind of extra time just doesn’t come around a lot right now. 

It’s almost completely still here in the neighborhood.  A Schwan’s truck went by about five minutes ago, but otherwise, there’s no traffic at all. Parker has the place to herself. The only sound is the breeze rattling through the ash tree behind me. Leaves are beginning to yellow and turn here and there. Michigan is gearing up for its big autumn show. The soy bean and corn fields that surround my school have all turned yellow and brassy. It’s officially fall, and there aren’t too many other places I can think of that are better to be at this time than Michigan.

Things are going okay. Suzy and I were talking over lunch about how each of us in the back of our heads kind of thought this move was going to be the silver bullet for all of our problems, that the glittering magic of a bigger town/school/ward/etc. was somehow going to cure all our ills. Obviously, that’s silly. Moving here has remedied some problems but created others. There are always problems and worries wherever you go. It’s never really a question of if, but more when, where, and what kind of problems you’ll have.

One thing that’s weird for me is starting over at work. At IVCC, I’d been there long enough and was established enough that I felt confident in almost any situation. There wasn’t a question or a concern a student or colleague could fire at me that I didn’t feel  reasonably well-equipped to handle. Now though, even though I’ve been a teacher of one kind of another for thirteen years, I haven’t been a teacher here, you know? Being untenured again, relearning a new culture and a new bureaucracy, and dealing with a different set of students have got me feeling slightly shaky. I’m not as confident in the classroom today as I was two months ago. And that’s a weird feeling that I don’t enjoy very much.

There’s nothing to do but teach through it and let time and experience accrue. Some classes are more fun to teach than others, so I’ll just let myself be nourished by them so I can handle the others. Just like any other job, right? Use the good moments to help you endure the not-so-good.

It’s been about twenty minutes since I started writing. Parker has filled up several pieces of playground equipment with pea gravel and is now brandishing a spear-like stick. I fear for my life at this moment. Time to shut down, walk home, and prep for my Wednesday night 5 -9 (yeah, you read that right – 4 hours of one class all in one shot – it’s like trying to inhale a Buick through a straw). Wish me luck.

Update

That last post was actually only half finished. It was late when I was writing it, and I'd decided to finish the rest the next day. Instead of pushing "Save," I apparently clicked on "Publish." Ah well. My devoted reader Linda commented on it anyway, thinking it was meant to be an interactive, finish-this-sentence activity. Yay for her giving me more credit than I deserve.

It's morning here, and I just dropped the older two off at school. We've been in Midland for about a month now, and we are still trying to figure things out. So far, Maryn has already had a more positive social experience here than she ever did in Illinois. There's a girl in her grade who lives just down the street and she has been a real sweetheart about stopping by and checking on Maryn regularly. She's been a valuable source of information about the school and neighborhood for us while making Maryn feel welcomed. It's been really nice.

What we thought might happen with Ave is happening. She started school in Tonica in the first grade and so was more or less an insider from the start. She had her little crew of friends there and even had her bestie, Faith. Here, for the first time in her life, she's the new kid and doesn't have a built-in social set. It's clear she feels unsettled and uncomfortable right now. You know how different people react to stress? Some people get weepy, some people withdraw, some people get all proactive about things? Well, some people turn into angry crab creatures from the Crab Nebula. Avery is of this sort, so the peace level in our home is a little low at the moment. It's only the second week of school so I'm not too worried about it. Ave is outgoing, funny, and confident (most of the time). I have a feeling she's going to find her footing sooner rather than later. (And hopefully she'll cheer the freak up when that happens. That kid is like Hurricane Avery when she's unhappy. Eeeesh.)

Parker is slowly adjusting too. Her first two Sundays in Primary at church were rocky, but she has stayed put for the last two weeks so we are moving in the right direction. She's very excited to start preschool at Chippewa. The way she even says the school's name is hilarious to me. You can hear her enthusiasm when she blares, "I'm going to Chip-uh-WAH!"

The ward here is funny. It's big, well-staffed, and full of very experienced members of the church. On the whole, members are very sincere and earnest. It's also kind of a humorless, not overly friendly place. It feels as though the entire place is made of skinny, marathon-running Dow chemists with crew cuts and six kids. It's a little Stepford in that way.

I should point out that it's not an unfriendly place per se, it's just not very warm. I think that comes from the fact that there are a lot of transient members that come through. Dow brings in interns and contract workers for nine months or a year here and there, so members are used to people showing up, renting for a bit, and then leaving. Consequently, it seems they hold back on really investing in welcoming new people. Ah well. I'm confident I won't hold three callings here, nor will there be a Sunday when I literally teach or speak all three hours of the block. Humorless, Dow-android members or not, that's got to be worth something.

The job is good. My students here skew younger than at IVCC. I have more traditional, fresh-out-of-high-school students here than before. But they seem open and game for what I've got going on in class, so I don't mind. My colleagues are pretty nice and welcoming. The facilities are a million times nicer than what I had at IV, and generally speaking, I'm just really happy with it.

Moving just kind of sucks. It takes a long time, it's expensive, it's tedious and sweaty, but also it just means dislocation and discomfort. It puts you in this new place and, even if it's a better place (which this is), it's still unfamiliar and you have to figure out how to make friends, how to fit in, how to get around and get along. It's uncomfortable, you know? I am not complaining. I'm merely pointing out some of the challenges inherent to our new situation. They are welcome problems to have but still problems.

Anyway, last week was Parker Faye's 4th birthday - which is bonkers - and next week is our own Avery Jane's 11th birthday. My, how time flies. We drove a mere hour and a half and met the Griswolds at Chuck E. Cheese's to celebrate Park Fu's big day and then went over to Paul and Linda's for dog-shaped cake. It was so wonderful to feel like we could just hop on the road, visit family, and be back by evening. I mean, how great is that? We are just right up the road from family more or less. Suzy and Linda and Erin and Amy can meet up at Birch Run for lunch. When some big superhero movie comes out, Ben and I can go catch it together instead of lamenting the fact that our wives hate stuff like that. Our kids can see their kids. Our kids get to have nearby grandparents. That, to me, is worth any discomfort and any number of weirdo Dow employees with very short hair. (Seriously, the hair thing is almost cult-like here.)

Anyway, it's probably time for me to prep for work. I only have one ENG 111 class today and a couple of office hours. I'm going to get some prep done for my classes next week and get myself organized so I can return to work on other projects (i.e. the dissertation - shhhhh - don't say its name too loudly. We don't want to scare it off again.)