Refuse Collection!!

I post this photo of us at a recent Primary activity at the Detroit temple for several reasons:
#1 - To show off what a good looking family I have. Suzanne is, of course, this beautiful, sophisticated woman and is, strangely enough, still married to me. The girls got their long, elegant necks and cloud-like skin from her. They got their giant pumpkin heads from me.
#2 - To show a more accurate, current photo of myself. My profile photo makes me look all shaggy and boho but in reality, I look much more like a 21st century Mormon than a 19th century Mormon these days.
#3 - To prove that I really do have a wife and that she's not made up and/or never seen like Vera from Cheers or Stan from Will and Grace. (It has been implied by some that Suzanne doesn't exist.)


I took this yesterday on the walk to Suzanne's building and I love it. Is it just a fancy way for the new casino to label its garbage dock or is it a manifesto-like statement encouraging us to defy the herd-ism of modern life? I know that it's definitely one but I definitely prefer the other.


Weird connection: Kosciusko is actually the name of a small town in Mississippi and was an area in my mission. (It's pronounced koz-ee-ES-ko.) I went on splits there once and it's very much what you'd expect from a rural town in that part of the country - an old fashioned town square with a statue of a Civil War soldier in the center, little brick-front businesses lining the streets, one area of nice, upscale houses, other areas of abject poverty. You expect Atticus Finch to walk up and ask if you need directions to the courthouse or something.

Anyway, the town's real claim to fame is that it is the birthplace of none other than Oprah Winfrey (or Opfrey as I choose to call her.) Everyone I talked to when I was there claimed to know her, said they "ran" together in high school or whatever. I believe them like I believe Napoleon Dynamite is "pretty good with a bo staff."

When I was there, I heard that the town was named after a Polish general but I never knew who he was or why a Mississippi town would be named after him.

Anyway, you can imagine my surprise at moving to Detroit, a place about as far removed from that green, genteel town square as you can get and finding a statue of good ol Tadeusz Kosciuszko, big as life, right on Michigan Avenue. Weird, right? (Atticus Finch might get mugged here for being a white lawyer. Then again, people here might admire what a good shot he is.)

Well, as it turns out, it's a lot less random to have Tadeusz here than in Mississippi. Detroit is full of people with Polish heritage. The community of Hamtramack which is just to the north and east of downtown is very Polish. (In fact, it's where the very terrible Claire Danes movie Polish Wedding was filmed.) And Kosciuszko, a figure from America's Revolutionary War, is a real cultural hero for Poles apparently. So having a giant statue of him here is equivalent to that blindingly white sculpture of Joseph Smith in the lobby of the JSM building in Salt Lake. Joseph never got anywhere near Utah but people there revere him, hence the statue. Same with Tadeusz here in Detroit. (Although he may have made it to Detroit at some point. I don't know.)

So what about Mississippi? Well, according to the Kosciusko Chamber of Commerce website, the town used to be called Red Bud Springs but "The county seat, Kosciusko, was named by the area's state representative, William Dodd. His grandfather, a Revolutionary War veteran, had greatly admired the Polish patriot, Tadeusz Kosciuszko, whose love of freedom led him to help the colonies during America's struggle for independence."

So essentially, it would be like my brother Jason founding his own town and naming it "Neil Peart" or my friend Tony founding his own community and calling it "Prince." Maryn would probably call her town "Polly Pocket-ville" and I, naturally, would call my settlement, "Mark Brown."

Just kidding. I'd name it "Iron Man."

If you got to name a town but had to name it after a person you admire, what would it be called?



I include this photo just because I think it's kinda cool. Guerilla art in Motor City.